Mum doesn't know what i'm thinking...

I was feeling quite depress this few days... Almost everyday kena scolded by my mum... SHe even ignore me sometimes... And told me that she's not gonna care about me anymore... I admit I did some stuff in the wrong way... But she doen't know what I'm thinking about and always thought that I must follow what she say... I've grown up... I want to do some things in my own way...

But from her point of view... What I do is always wrong... She never praise me even when I told her that I got top in chinese... And even scolded me when I told her that I'm going out or go to my uncle house to watch the video tapes tha the had recorded for me almost 3 months ago... Please lor... I want to go out and have some fun or to chase my idols... Can't you think why I'll have the time for this?? I can manage my school work and I need time for fun... Can't I just take it as a time for me to enjoy myself after studying and getting good grades?? I can really manage both things well at the same time... It doesn't seem that when I go chase after Renfu then my grades went down... My grades are still the same ... Some subjects are improving... Can't I have the chance to enjoy myself?? Or you think that the best way is to be at home every single day after school... Not to go anywhere??

Alright... I'll stop talking abt it if nt I my find myself crying soon...